Friday, February 16, 2007

Happy Birthday Dear Leader!!

The Ministry of Truth sends it's most earnest birhtday greetings to one of the People's Heroes, Dear Leader Kim Jong Il. Kim Jong Il has led the workers paradise of the Democratic People's Republic of Korea (DPRK) to become the most prosperous country in the world! He is a champion against the hated Amerikkkan kapitalist pig dog scum who believe in such nonsensical ideas as personal responsibility, individualism, and property ownership. When will the evil Amerikkkans wake up and realize that all persons must serve all other persons and that The Party is the only true way to prosperity for all! That is our struggle comrades, and with Dear Leader Kim Jong Il fighting the good fight against kapitalism and individuality eventually we will prevail!
He has shown his cunning with this latest 'deal' with the Amerikkkans about stopping the People's right to arm themselves with nuclear weapons against the kapitalists. This shows how foolish the kapitalists are! They do not even realize that Glorious Uber Comrade HRC's husband did this very thing in the nineties, and Dear Leader showed them! He took their appeasement offerings and went on developing the Nuclear Weapons of the People! Ha ha! Foolish Kapitalists! Keep sending your tithe to the DPRK, and Dear Leader will use your kapitalist exploitation units against you for the betterment of The Party!

Thursday, February 15, 2007

People's State of Kalifornia Raises the Bar!

Comrades! Glorious news from the People's State of Kalifornia! It seems that they are trying to make up for the dissidents that have infiltrated Kalifornia to take away support from Glorious Uber Comrade HRC, but I digress. I cannot formulate into words the sheer brilliance of this maneuver by the People's School Board, you must simply read it for yourself in it's entirety, and watch the video.
In the words of the Father of the Revolution Vladimir Ilyich Lenin:

“Give us the child for 8 years and it will be a Bolshevik forever”

Long live the Glorious Revolution!!

Monday, February 12, 2007

New Cause of Global Warming Discovered

Glorious Comrade Margaret has discovered the biggest producer of global warming to date! She stumbled upon while doing intense Party approved research.
We must all join the cause and stop this menace before the polar bears have no snow to frolic in while the do their polar beary dances of delight! Think of their children! And your children! And your neighbors children! And children of things that haven't any children yet, but would if they knew that their children could do child like things while they are children living in their children world!! Children children children! Have you no heart?!
If you do not take up this fight you hate the children and all things child like and you will be purged by the children because you hate them so!

Tuesday, February 6, 2007

Accolades to Georgia Tech

Comrades! All glories and accolades to the free thinkers of the student newspaper The Georgia Tech Technique which is of course from Georgia Tech. These brave editors are standing up to the evil hated kapitalist pig dog scum by refusing to print their lies. How dare the hated kapitalists attack the innocent peace and freedom loving jihadis! It just shows another reason why the imperialists need to be stopped and why The Party is the only organization that can be trusted. Do not give in to the lies peaceful freedom loving persons of Georgia Tech, The Party stands with you!

PS. If you could throw into your reasoning for resisting that you are doing it for the children, there may be an extra potato ration for you.

Monday, February 5, 2007

Glorious Uber Comrade HRC Speaks Truth o' The People

At The Party's Winter Meeting, Glorious Uber Comrade HRC stood up and shouted the Party's goals for the world to hear! The most beautiful segment, which brought the Party faithful to tears and the evil kapitalist pig dug scum to their knees was this:

"Again, we're working to try to push this agenda forward. The other day the oil companies reported the highest profits in the history of the world. I want to take those profits and I want to put them into a strategic energy fund..." (Full transcript of her Gloriousness's speech here. It is Party Mandated Required Reading.)

It is a glorious day comrades when the Party can openly denounce the kapitalist pig dog scum to the cheers of the masses! It is truly a sign of the massive progress The Party has made! Rejoice! Extra beet rations for all this month!

Glorious Uber Comrade HRC has stayed true to the Party's ideals throughout the years, unlike some un-persons who have since been purged from the records. You can see that she has spoke of the coming Worker's Paradise of the People's Soviets of Amerika since 2001!

Example 1 Example 2 Example 3 Example 4

Of course they are all of the same instance, the reason being that it is proof that she did in fact say those very things and others cannot claim that she is not one of the Party Faithful! I speak of course of those purveyors of hate and evil kapitalist pig dog scum ideology, Hot Air.

Do not be swayed or lose faith Comrades! The eve of the Workers Paradise is nigh! And remember, Glorious Uber Comrade HRC does it all for the children!